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Chase School/Transcript

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(The scene opens up in an academy's two buildings and a few trees as the hand bells are sounded and the screen pans to a statue of Tom chasing Jerry, a bench where two students, one, a kitten, the other, a mouse sit and some mice and kittens approach the lecture hall, the scene changes to the interior of the lecture hall, where a teacher is about to lecture crowds of kittens and mice.)

Teacher: (clears throat) Welcome, students, to your first class. (taps his baton on a presentation easel) Today, we have two very special guests, those famous stars of stage, screen, television, and comic books, the tenacious, but triumphant, Tom Cat...

(Tom walks onstage, and bows as the kitten students cheer, but the mice students glare angrily at Tom.)

Teacher: And his antagonist, or protagonist-- ha ha ha ha ha. Depending on your point of view, the tiny, but terrible, Jerry Mouse!

(Jerry slides onstage and runs around a bewildered Tom, then does his routine, as he places his hat on his head as the mice students cheer and the kitten students glare angrilly at the mice. As Jerry waves, Tom kicks Jerry's back and acts nonchalant as Jerry gets angry at Tom from that stunt.)

Teacher: We will use our two subject to study the cleverness of the cat as He stalks his perhenial prey, the mouse.

Mouse Student 1: Hey, let's face it. Cats are stupid.

(The kitten students glare at the mice students)

Kitten Student 1: What'd you say, shorty? You know what I say?

(The mice students glare at the kitten students.)

Kitten Student 1: Mice ain't nice.

Mouse Student 1: Oh, yeah?

Kitten Student 1: Oh, Yeah!

Mouse Student 1: Yeah?

Kitten Student 1: Says who?

Mouse Student 1: Says me, that's who!

(The students squabble verbally.)

Teacher: Order, order! (He taps his baton on his podium. The students react scaredly and return to their seats.) Now, let me show you what this course is all about. (pulls down a movie screen) Lights, please. (the lights are turned off as a movie reel of Tom chasing Jerry at a park starts) The essence is chase and evasion, as demonstrated by our two guest stars. Watch the screen carefully. (Tom gets closer to Jerry) That's the chase… (Tom crashes into a fire hydrant and passes out) ...and that's the evasion. (The mice students cheer, holding pieces of paper saying "10" and "10 1/2", but the kitten students glare angrilly at them. One girl mouse student jumps up and holds a sign saying "Jerry, I Love You!") Today, We have real-live examples of the very finest chasers and evaders. as everyone knows, these gentlemen are the best.

(Jerry bows to the students as they cheer offscreen, but Tom gets in front of Jerry and bows to the students, making Jerry angry because the kitten upstaged Him, and Tom whaps Jerry.)

Teacher: To ensure the integrity of the chase, (pulls out a stopwatch) We will give the mouse a ten-second lead, and follow he progress of the ensuing chase. Begin. (pushes a stopwatch button.) One... (Jerry dashes off.) Two... (Tom goes after Jerry.) Ha ha. So Much for integrity.

Mouse Student 1: Hmph! You see that? (The Kitten Students glare at the Mice Students) Ya can't trust Cats!

Kitten Student 1: (gets up on His seat) Says Who?

Mouse Student 1: Says Me!

Mouse Student 2: (gets up on His seat) Eat tuna, Fuzz-Face!

Kitten Student 1: Oh, Yeah? Well, Your mother eats cheese!

(The Chase Students brawl in a cloud of violence.)

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